Under a Bushel

Def Ignitions 2

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Cosmetication: Mood makeup and concealer of the true blue you [E.g.: Nobody likes a sad sack, so go pop a Prozac!]

Concoction: A very big shell sale

Homophonic Composure II

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On the Marrakesh Express, it’s easy to spot the loco motive in this train of thought:

My Moroccan friend, Benjam, is smitten
By wanderlust, thus I have written:
Segovia Spain,
Khachaturian train,
‘Ere long you’ll be, Benjam, in Britten.

Kicking off 2011 with a bang

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Very cheeky, yes, but hardly homophobic. It’s purely homophonic pun funning in this second nod to silver-quilled Will. Shakespeare scholars know what a big-time bawdster he was –the Bard was also the Bawd of Avon –and he’d appreciate a limerick chock-a-block with references to his work. So while Sarah would, William would never “refudiate” the rhyme below. And while any major dude would probably post without preface or apology, I’m a lass and alack that male cockiness. For better or verse, it is my asterisk and as graphic as it gets here.

Shakespeare Innuendo

‘Twas a pederast faerie named Puck
Picked the Titus Snug Bottom to f*ck
And by prick in that bum,
Did this wicked way come;
But his Love’s Labour’s Lost, cuz he’s stuck!

Shine On

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When finally their minds’ eyes met, it was love at second sight.

© KAM

Handel’s Bar

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The result of some nasty Bartok
Was a Mahler’s Fauré Offenbach.
“Now aren’t these Menotti,”
Said Handel Scarlatti,
“Haydn these Sessions in Bach!”

Eine Kleine Nacht Fugue

Sprach die junge Frau Bach to her spouse:
”Ich krank of your fugueing heraus;
Mach your fugueing herein,
Und maybe you’ll find
Some more kleinen Bachs in den Haus!”

Nashville Kat

My country cousin, Twavis Twit, and his bluegrass band, Ear Juice, asked me for some song ideas the other day. I came up with these:

Stop Scrapin’ the Scab Off My Healin’ Heart, Honey

Hardheaded Against Hard Hearts

I’d Rather Be a Recluse Than Be a Loose Wreck

The Shape of Things to Come

A robotics researcher named Wally
Built a robot bombshell he dubbed “Dolly”
With a bountiful baud;
But his jealous wife, Maud,
Removed baud-y bits, now it’s “Ollie.”

Then to make Wally jealous, Maud bought
A robot called “Rod Megawatt.”
She’s so hot for her Rod,
Wally queried of Maud:
“Just what hath Rod got that I’ve not?!”

Def ignition for the Jung and the restless

Downbeat Tags [Cont.]

Filled with angst and wondering why my ex is tense.

Friday’s Child in a Wednesday World.

I seized the day, but it struggled free and slapped me in the face.